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My new journey.

Thursday, I had lab work done. Like usual, I went in and had my blood work done. Like normal, I went in, waited, sat in the chair and the nurse took my blood. Looking away from the needle so I don't pass out.  Five minutes later and all of my blood being sucked out of my body, I returned to my life. I don't usually get my results quickly, but this time I did. Getting older, my Dr. ordered more test done than I usually do. I didn't think it would be any different than the last time. 

Unfortunately, I didn't get any good news from these results. Friday I spoke with my Dr. and I found out I have Type 2 Diabetes and my cholesterol is through the roof BAD. All over my reports it read and stated my obesity was the cause of most everything. I'm high risk for heart disease and heart attack. This is scary. 

Obviously, I am not shocked, I got here all on my own. Food is my addiction. Food is my emotional safe place. Food fills my emotional ups and down, my void. It's a bad habit, I know. I did it to myself. I am not an unhappy person by nature, and I have accepted where I have put myself. I don't body shame myself and I'm not angry about where my body is. Although I would love to be skinny, my old self again, that person disappeared a long time ago. 

I've been skinny, too skinny. I was a different person. I have a life at what I am now. It's a been there, done that kind of thing for me. I am happy with my life. I live a very blessed life. I am grateful at where I am now. Grateful for the people, friends and things I've accomplished in my life. 

With my diagnoses, I now have to seriously LOSE A LOT OF WEIGHT. I'm talking about, a lot. With my height, age and natural body structure (whatever that means), I should not be at the weight that I'm at. I've know this, but it's never been a health issue. Even with all my past blood work, my migraines, my accident with some past medication, my memory loss, it's never come up as an issue in my health. Well, here I am, obese and it's affecting my health now. 

My reports also stated that I was physically inactive. Which is true. My only best friend lives in another state, my family lives close and I don't have any active hobbies I do anymore. My job doesn't require a lot of physical activity anymore. My husband travels a lot. I literally don't do a lot anymore. I just work and stay at home. I'm a total home body. I'm totally content with my life.

I've shown signs of being a diabetic in the last few months, but I've connected all my symptoms to something else. I had an ankle injury in January that took WAY too long to heal. Which was odd. I just thought I had REALLY hurt myself bad and put it off as getting older. I've had some gum deterioration, but in my most recent dental exam, my Dentist said I would have gum and teeth issues as I get older. Since my childhood, I've had teeth and gum issues. So I didn't think anything of it. I've had blurry vision, but in my last eye exam, my prescription changed, but I haven't replaced my contacts and glasses with my new prescription, so I just figured it was that. My skin has been really dry but of course, it's winter. The fatigue, headaches, increase in thirst all are symptoms that I get from my migraine medicine. Especially the thirst, but I'm on a new diet pill that causes thirst and dry mouth. All of these symptoms are also sign of being a diabetic, but it was always something else I thought it could have been related to. I haven't been feeling myself for the last few weeks, but again, I just put it off as being part of my other health issues. My migraine medicine really puts my body out of whack but it's better than having a migraine. Lesser of the evils. 

I was immediately put on medication for my diabetes. No if's and's or but's. I took the last couple of days to indulge in my favorite foods and drinks. I have to get my cholesterol under control as well the diabetes. Which means, total change in my foods and my life style. 

I have three months to get my levels under control. Losing weight will more than likely eliminate my cholesterol concerns and we will see how I am doing on my diabetes medicine. Three months to lose some weight, change my eating habits and pray I do well on the medication. I also have to get myself to be more active. 90 days. 90 days to see where I stand.  90 days to see where the rest of my life will go. 

It could be worse, but I'm scared. 

  

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