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everyone is getting old

it's strange to watch my parents get older. my mom and her memory is just disintegrating. my dad is still pretty strong and healthy but his heart attack scared the living shit out of me. i have a plan in place for my dad if something happens to my mom, but i didn't even begin to imagine the vice versa. so now my plans have shifted and i have a plan in place for either or situations. being the oldest i guess it's just a natural instinct to care for your parents. my parents don't like to include us in their health issues. they don't tell me what's going on, i have to coax it out of them. i'm not a parent, but i'm sure it's their way of protecting us. 

i don't like to see my parents struggle with things that use to come so easily to them. 

i know that one day they won't be here and it scares me. i fear the day i get a horrible phone call. i call my mom and dad every single day. i talk to them daily even sometimes multiple times a day. i make my dad help me work on my jeep. and i make my mom do things with me even if she doesn't want to. i've begun to hoard things that my parents give me. 

it's just strange. i don't like it. but i know it's part of life.

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