good grief, i just scrolled thru some of my old blog post and most of them are ridiculous. some of them are confusing, and most of them are just sad. reading thru my post and im like "who is this person?" oh, that's me writing it. geez. what was i doing? what was i thinking? why did i write what i wrote? why did i even care about some of the things i decided to post. a lot of it is me just saying i haven't posted and trying to get my life together. why was i always writing about getting my life together? also i didn't realize that i wrote about my memory loss so long ago... 2019? soooo i guess my memory loss is real. i should actually start blogging more so i can remember everything and read back and again, ask myself, wtf was i doing? a lot of my post are pre-facebook and instagram so i guess this is how i use to communicate on the internet? probably. but for fuck-sake. i debated on deleting my old post, but what's the fun in that? seeing my progression (or more like digression) on this media platform is kind of funny to me. to my younger self now, get over yourself and live yo life. i know why i started this blog but i will never confess why. youre welcome internet. mysterious maricel is still here. #boom