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Growing Pains

I remember one time when I was little I had this big birthday party that I was so excited to go to! Well all week my mom told me I needed to clean my room or there would be consequences. "Maricel, if dont clean ur room you wont be going to your friends birthday party on Saturday..." I kept putting it off and putting it off till the very last minute. I tried my damnedest to clean efficiently and quickly Saturday morning, I did the bare minimum and crossing my fingers hoping it would pass inspection. but of course it did not pass inspection and mom said I wouldnt be going to the birthday. I didnt believe her, so I got ready anyways and when it was time to leave, it didnt happen. OH MY GOODNESS the way that I was crying and screaming and thrashing around you would have thought it was the end of the world. Well to me it was. My world was crashing, my mom was ruining my life. All my friends would be there and I would miss out on everything. I remember the feelings that I had that day because the pains that I felt were so real and so deep. No matter how much I screamed and cried and made all the promises in the world, my mom put her foot down and I missed the birthday party of the year. I cried so hard I made myself sick, my eyes were swollen shut for a good hour because of how hard i was crying and i caused myself to lose my voice due to all the ragging crying screaming i did. like no matter how much i pleaded with my mother she was not having it. her answer was no every time. this continued for hours, and im pretty sure the party was over and i was still pleading with my mom to please let me go. "please mom, please!! just let me go!" ill clean my room next time when you ask me right away, ill keep it clean for forever if you just let me go." begging pleading crying blubbering mess! i got nothing.

if i had just cleaned my room like my mom had asked. cleaned a few days here and there it would have been done by Saturday and i would have been able to attend my friends birthday party and have cake and hang out with my friends. but no. i didnt think about the consequences i didnt think how not cleaning my room would effect me in the long run. i thought id get away with it. because what mom wants to see their child miss the birthday party of the year. i am not a parent but i cant see a parent liking having  to say no to their child. but i didnt listen. and rules are rules. so the only person i hurt here, was myself.

you'd think as an adult we would have learned from these mistakes that we experienced while growing up. like dont touch the stove because its hot and it will burn you. of course i touched it and had a finger print missing for several weeks. dont curse because you'll get ur mouth washed out with soap, im pretty sure i had the cleanest mouth on the block. dont leave ur bike outside because the rain will cause it to rust and you will be left w/out a bike, i got lots of exercise that summer because i was the idiot child running up and down the street after my friends that had bikes. pick up your dress up clothes because you dont want the cats to ruin them, one of my cats sprayed all over a huge pile of all my very favorite dress up dresses and we had to throw them away because cat spray smell does not come out of clothes. all these things that we are supposed to learn from. but do we? im gonna follow up with this and say NO.

so you see. just because we are no longer 5 or 15 or 25...at age 27 i am still making childish mistakes that could have been avoided if i had just listened in the first place. and now im suffering the consequences that i do not like at all. and the only person to blame here, is myself. fuck.

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