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Gearing up...

...for this weekend festivities!! Ashley's bachelorette party is finally here! (well tomorrow) Thanks to Libby, Steph and Mere for putting everything together. The cake, the hotel, dinner and then hittin' uptown with a huge group of lovely ladies! It's going to be a blast and I can't wait! We are bound to get into some kind of trouble! ;-) hopefully not too much though!

Puerto Rico is right around the corner! And I am SUPER DUPER pumped! Steph and I leave Wednesday morning and will arrive in P/R in the early/late evening. I am so relived to know that I will not be traveling alone. Ashley, Dan and several other people in the bridal party are on the same flight. Charli and Josh leave Thursday and wont get in till 6pm. I have been keeping track of the weather in P/R and it's been raining everyday and the forecast says its going to be raining the entire week that we are there. I hope its not raining when we land. The weather here will be fine, but I cant say the same for P/R. I have xanax to help with the panic attacks in case I get too nervous. Unfortunately, I will be traveling alone for the return flight home. EECCCK! I have xanax for that too. AND my flight is not a straight flight home. I have one stop in Miami, FL. I have to actually get off the plane and onto another plane and there is a two hour layover. (or whatever it is they call it) Since I have never traveled this far alone, I figured I'd rather fly to P/R with people and figured I would be okay flying back alone. But the more I think about it, the more I think it was just a bad idea to think I could fly alone. I barely get around the DFW airport alone, I dont know how I'm going to manage to get around alone in some airport that I'm not even familiar with! Just thinking about it makes me so scared and I might just end up crying in the middle of the airport. I keep trying to tell myself that I have to be adult about this and that I can do this... but then a little voice in the back of my head tells me I can't. I'm 26 years old and Im terrified to fly. I have all my paper work to come back in to the US so thats not a problem. I dont know what I'll do if something awful happens and I cant get back in! But hopefully nothing bad will happen and everything will run smoothly. Hopefully luck will be on my side. But other than that, I only see good things coming from this trip! Everyone is so excited for Dan and Ashley. I cant wait to see my friend walk down the aisle to marry her best friend! I am so happy for both of them to have found each other.

Once we get back from P/R its full throttle for planning Charlotte's wedding! I am looking forward to helping Charli plan her special day! Along with Charli's wedding I also have SEVERAL other weddings that I have to attend as well. It's pretty much non stop wedding till the end of the year for me. I thought last year was hectic....I was wrong...this year trumps last year by far! Maybe some day I'll be planning my wedding. But I dont see that happening ANYTIME soon! oh wells! Such is life. 

There are always consequences when dating or hooking up with mutual friends of friends. Or just dating in general. Dating really sucks! Especially when everyone you meet is so completely broken just as much as you are. I don't understand why someone has to be shady. I have a past and I have secretes. But at least Im honest about it. I'm not an open book, but Im not shady about it either. I feel like I keep having to repeat myself....All I ask of someone is to communicate with me! Is it really that hard? I know it wasn't easy for me in the past to communicate and Im understanding about that, but we are adults. We aren't in high school, we aren't in our early 20's anymore and I am not here to play games or here for just a 'good time'. I've already done all that. I know what I'm looking for, I know what I want and I know what I deserve. I'm a really nice, laid back and down to earth kind of girl. But if you piss me off too many times, I have no problem just walking away! 
Just. Sayin'. :)

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