I've changed so much. Who I thought I was, who I believed myself to be, has changed. I've changed before but I've had someone by my side or someone to guide me thru. This time, it's different. Before when I've changed as a person, I never really knew what I wanted. It was like changing with the seasons. Its going to happen, you cant stop it.
But this time around, its different. I've changed as a person, I've learned so much about myself that I didn't know about before. And this time, I know what I want. I know what I need. But will I get it. Will I be able to have what I secretly and desperately want. I think I'm too damaged to even be able to handle it. And that scares me. Am I too broken? Will I unknowingly but consciously sabotage myself in order to protect myself from getting hurt by anyone or even myself? Im unsure and my head is cloudy but it's clear as day at the same time.
But this time around, its different. I've changed as a person, I've learned so much about myself that I didn't know about before. And this time, I know what I want. I know what I need. But will I get it. Will I be able to have what I secretly and desperately want. I think I'm too damaged to even be able to handle it. And that scares me. Am I too broken? Will I unknowingly but consciously sabotage myself in order to protect myself from getting hurt by anyone or even myself? Im unsure and my head is cloudy but it's clear as day at the same time.